Friday, May 23, 2008

Keeping it Real

I have been a mom for 11 years now.
I have been a wife for almost 12.
I have cooked oodles and oodles of meals over the years.
Now, I admit . . . when I first started out, things were a little "ify".
I was learning on the fly. Trial and error.
When we had company, and I would cook a new dish, my husband would say,
"That drives me crazy when you do that! Why don't you cook a tried and true stand-by?"
"Honey," I'd reply sweetly and patiently, "I don't really think serving cold cereal would be appropriate tonight."
I had no "tried and true stand-bys".

Of course, we had to endure the humiliation of whisking away half-cooked chicken from the table just as our guest was about to "dig in". (Yes, this actually happened when our good friend and former pastor was staying at our home . . . sigh . . . )
But, now I think I'm a pretty good cook.
I have acquired a "few" tried and true dishes. My kids actually even enjoy a few of them.
I no longer sweat when we invite people over. (Well, not much anyway.)
But tonight changed my thinking on all of that.
As I was in the kitchen preparing the wonderful meal that my family will soon partake in, my 3 year old ran in and said, "Mom! What are we having?!" (He speaks with exclamation marks constantly.)
I told him, "hamburgers and fries".
Then my 5 year old, so sweetly and tenderly said, "Oh good! The burnt kind?"

Sigh.
Oops . . . gotta go . . . I smell something!

Tuesday, May 20, 2008


How could this happen?
We've been married almost 12 years and I never saw this coming!

My husband just announced that . . .
he prefers Pepsi over Coke!

What??!
What do you mean??
Do you realize the HUGE ramifications of your decision, Honey????
My father's father worked for Coca-Cola Co. so obviously we drank nothing but Coke.
His father before him drank nothing but Coke.
His father before him drank nothing but Coke.
His father before him drank nothing but Coke.
And so on and so on and so on.
For hundreds of generations!
Do you see how HUGE this is?
"But Honey," he insists. "It's not that I don't like Coke. I'd just prefer a Pepsi."
No. That doesn't fly. There is a HUGE difference. You've crossed the line, Bucky.
On our first date, I knew that my husband was the one I was to going to marry.
You know how?
'Cause when he went to order something refreshing to drink,
he ordered a "Coke float".
You see?
He was telling me that like so many millions of Americans,
the only obvious choice for taste and refreshment was a Coke
(of course a little ice cream added to it never hurts!).
So now what will I do?
As a wife, I am to be submitted to my husband in all things.
Is this really an area of freedom?? (I don't think so.)
The Bible clearly states not to be "unequally coke-d".
How will we raise our children?

I need to go think . . .

And have a Coke!


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